A Companion's Heart

Copyright © 1997 by Jacqueline Lichtenberg and Cheryl Wolverton All rights reserved. Attention Webmasters: All copyrights to fiction set in the Sime~Gen Universe are officially registered with the Library of Congress and Jacqueline Lichtenberg holds all the rights to that fictional Universe while some of the co-authors she has invited hold the rights to their own novels. You may not repost any of the Sime~Gen fiction you may find posted on the Web. However, we will be most pleased to trade links with your site should you believe your visitors would be interested in this Universe.

Email: AmbrovZeor@aol.com

This story was written by Cheryl Wolverton; the marvelous illustrations are by Kaas Baichtal. Original HTML conversion by the author, modified for CZ by the webservant, Mike Giroux. Please mail us your comments!

"I don't feel so good."

Concerned, Alissa studied the young woman on the horse next to hers. "You'll be fine."

"It's true, isn't it? I'm changing into one of those Sime things that kill people."

"They don't kill people, just...Gens." She muttered the last word. "Don't worry, Jeanetta," she added trying to sound more reassuring, "I told you you'd be safe with me."

"But you're a Gen," Jeanetta accused.

"Well, yes. However, I come from Sime Territory, remember? I've seen many people go through changeover. Simes aren't monsters like you think."

Jeanetta moaned and pulled her horse up abruptly. Sliding off, she ran to the bushes where she was terribly ill.

Alissa hurried after her. The hot muggy overcast day wasn't helping Jeanetta's disposition any. Her hair was plastered to her face and neck looking as bad as Jeanetta's words predicated this changeover was going to be. Gently, Alissa gathered Jeanetta's long blond hair in her hands and braided it. "I'm afraid we're not going to make it out of Gen Territory before you changeover, Jeanetta."

"But I don't want to changeover. You promised me you'd take me to that Householding place where both Simes and Gens live. I don't want to die out here. I don't want to kill you."

Alissa gently finger combed the bangs off Jeanetta's face. "You won't kill me. I worked in a Householding. I told you about the Sime, Tannon, who found me after I'd established as a Gen. I was on the run, but he saved me."

"You said you almost died."

Alissa cringed. She hadn't told the entire story to Jeanetta. "Well, I did. But Tannon was in worse shape." She thought back to Tannon, remembered the man who had come to mean so much to her before she'd left the Householding. She'd wanted to come and live in Gen Territory where she wouldn't have to hide behind walls to be protected from attacking Simes. "Tannon is Sime like you'll soon be. And, like I explained before, Jeanetta, each month a Sime must have selyn, that energy that every Gen produces to live."

"Which means I'm going to kill you like every other Sime kills Gens."

"No. The Householdings have found that it's the fear a Gen experiences that brings about their death. Do you understand me? The Sime doesn't cause the death. The Gen's fear provokes the Sime into the attack and kill. I served Tannon. He's a very powerful Sime. You'll be easy to serve. When your tentacles break out--"

Jeanetta moaned.

"That's going to happen. You have to accept it. Those bubbles on your arms...a tentacle is going to break out of each one. Four on each arm plus your two laterals. When that happens, you're going to have to have selyn. I'll be here for you. You'll wrap those tentacles around my own arms, make a fifth contact point--lip to lip--and then your laterals will draw the energy from me. There's nothing to worry about."

"I won't do it."

Alissa sighed. She stood and began to erect a tent. "Don't be ridiculous. Of course you will. You live or die hunter instinct will take over. You won't have any control. The control will come from me. You aren't going to hurt me. Now, get inside the shelter here. It's starting to rain."

Just what Alissa needed on top of everything else.

Rain.

"What about ... do you suppose," Jeanetta hesitated.

"What, Jeanetta? I can't read your mind." She studied the young girl and it was obvious something other than just changeover was haunting her. "Tell me what's the matter."

"Do you think Donick knows you're gone yet? Do you think he's coming after you?"

That was something her young charge certainly didn't need to be worrying about. She smiled, trying to get rid of the tension that wanted to grip her over that unsolved situation. Jeanetta was the important one. She was the one who required the reassurance, the guarantee that that monster wouldn't come after them. If she was worried about that, it might just affect her, causing her to use too much selyn and die before the tentacles ever had a chance to break out.. "You're worrying about things which aren't important. I told Donick I wouldn't marry him. He won't follow me." An uneasy sensation crept up her spine because she knew she wasn't one hundred percent certain. "Let's just worry about you right now."

Alissa slipped into the tent beside Jeanetta. The rain started slowly then increased it's tempo. Jeanetta moved through the stages of changeover quickly. Her young child's body accepted the responsibility of adulthood--that time when a person either became Gen or Sime despite what they wanted.

Unlike what they believed in Gen Territory, that Gens were the ancient humans and Simes were monsters, Alissa believed that Simes and Gens were a mutation of the Ancient race who both had to function together to live. Tannon had taught her that.

"Don't worry, Jeanetta. We'll get you through this and get you to Tannon and Householding Carre," Alissa soothed.

"Promise me you won't leave me. You'll come with me," Jeanetta begged as a strong contraction hit Jeanetta's arms. She pulled her tender forearms close against her body and moaned.

"I have nothing here for me, Jeanetta. I told you that. I was wrong ever to leave Sime Territory. I was safe behind the walls of Carre. Their laws protected me. More than that, Carre is where I belonged."

Alissa thought back to all she'd left behind. Despite having to live behind walls, she'd found a place where she could help, could make a difference. She just hadn't realized it. In Sime Territory, Simes looked at Gens as animals, food for their selyn-starved bodies. In Gen Territory Gens looked at Simes as monsters, devoid of souls, preying upon them simply for the taste of killing.

Yet in the Householding, Simes and Gens lived in peace. Gens didn't fear Simes because of people like Tannon, who were channels. A channel could take selyn from a Gen and then give it to a Sime who had to have selyn to live on. Simes lived on selyn much like Gens lived on calories. Once a month a Sime required transfer of selyn or they would die. It was possible for Simes to take transfer from channels and not kill a Gen. Alissa had been a special Gen, a Companion to Tannon who was a channel. Yet she had given all of that up to come to Gen Territory where she could live without worries.

She had found out there were worries and prejudices on both sides of the border. Donick had brought that home...Donick, whom she'd almost married because of her stupid dream to belong.

"Alissa, something is happening. My arms feel different. I don't know...I need, I ... oooh... I'm seeing things, bright lights...you look, oh it's so beautiful, shiny--"

"You're zlinning, Jeanetta," Alissa said softly. "Get ready and on the next contraction I want you to throw your hands out and allow your tentacles to break through. Congratulations," she whispered.

Suddenly, Jeanetta stiffened.

"So. It's true, you filthy Sime-lover. You betrayed me."

Alissa gasped, swinging around to confront her former fiancee, the man whom she'd only found out a few days before was a fanatic about the death of all Simes.

How had he found her?

With deadly intent he raised his arm. Lightening flashed off metal.

Alissa lunged, knocking Donick's arm from it's downward path toward Jeanetta's heart, getting tossed across the tent for her endeavor.

Jeanetta screamed. The ambient in the tent had to be hurting her, Alissa thought. She was only thankful Donick didn't have the knife. She pushed herself up from the ground..

And saw Donick's furious face at being thwarted.

She knew what that meant. With a cry, she launched herself at the soaking wet Donick, trying to protect Jeanetta--too late. The ugly sound of flesh against flesh as Donick's fist connected with Jeanetta's jaw chilled Alissa.

Jeanetta's eyes rolled back in her head.

"You shendoni-be-flayed idiot!" she cried out, thrusting herself between Jeanetta and Donick. "Jeanetta's in changeover. Her tentacles are about to break out! How could you have done that? She would've been on the other side of the border before you knew it. What harm could she have done?"

With brutal force, Donick jerked Alissa toward him, falling on top of her, pinning her to the ground. "What harm?" he rasped out, his fury making his voice choppy. "It's our duty to destroy her." She knew his religion believed all Simes should die. How idiotic of her to forget, even for a second in her anger. "One less Sime is one less possibility that she'll raid across the border and kill one of us. But it wasn't her I wanted. It was you. You promised to marry me. Or have you forgotten?"

He glanced at the unconscious girl lying so still and pale and an ugly gleam entered his eyes. "But I don't want you now. I have no room for a Sime-lover in my life."

Alissa saw Jeanetta's bleeding from the wound Donick had inflicted had lessened. She thought she even saw Jeanetta's left arm twitch slightly. At least the girl wasn't dead. But if she didn't have Alissa there when her tentacles broke out, she might as well be.

Alissa wiggled but was unable to budge the massive bulk of the fanatic who had her trapped on the muddy ground. She could feel rivulets of water continually running under her where the rain from outside had made its way into their small tent. Looking into Donick's unnaturally bright eyes, she shivered, going completely still. He was quite mad, she decided in that instant. "We already discussed marriage and I turned you down."

"I told you I'd be back. I came back last night, thinking we could talk a little more ... you didn't expect that," he sneered. "You'd already left. I knew you were trying to escape back to your perverts in Sime Territory and I couldn't let that happen. The people in town would never forget it if I did. They'd know that a Sime-loving whore turned me down." Alissa wondered what she'd ever seen in him. Why had she thought it necessary to come to Gen Territory? Why had she thought it was where she belonged when she belonged at Carre with Tannon.

Oh, Tannon how I want you right now. You could help me. I wouldn't have even been in this mess if I'd listened to you. My destiny wasn't in Gen Territory, but by your side. But it looked like it was going to be too late to tell him now. Feelings she had hidden until now surfaced, the joy of being by his side, of helping him when he served another Sime, of sitting in the evenings and just talking, when he had the time. He was the head of the Household. His time was often taken up with duties. What she wouldn't give to be there with him now instead of here, pinned to the ground by a madman who was going to murder her and leave her lifeless body to be picked clean by the predators. Tannon would never know what had happened to her. He would never know of her change of heart, that she was coming back to him and Carre.

Alissa swallowed convulsively.

Jeanetta stirred. Alissa tamped down on her tension. The last thing Jeanetta required was the wild emotions flying around her. Simes did not react well to savage emotions. The least little thing could jar their selyn fields. And it could cause a Sime in need, one who required selyn like Jeanetta did right now, to attack and kill a Gen.

Urgently, Alissa repeated, "I'll go with you--now. Only just get off me."

"Like I said, I don't want you as my wife anymore. I do want you, though. And, after I'm done, I'll take you back to the town for their vengeance, or at least I'll take what's left of you."

Donick suddenly crushed her against him, taking her mouth in a punishing kiss, hurting the earlier bruise he'd left.

Alissa felt dizzy, unable to breathe. She began to struggle, twisting her head, attempting to break free. When she thought she would faint, he lifted his head. Letting go of her hands, he reared up to rip her blouse off. Alissa saw her chance. In a lightning quick movement, she raised her hands and swung them, hitting him in the chest. She watched stunned as he only wavered. His face flushed red and his eyes narrowed with rage.

"So, you still have spirit left in you?" His fist slammed into her jaw.

She saw stars. Pain and the coppery taste of blood filled her mouth. Black dots swam in front of her eyes. She was going to pass out. She fought it, slowly struggling back to awareness.

Donick took advantage of her momentary passiveness. He ripped her shirt and grabbed at her breast. "You'll pay you little whore," he whispered, and lowered his mouth to her throat.

With a supreme effort, Alissa twisted and thrust her knee up.

Donick stiffened. A low moan hissed through his teeth. Cupping himself, he fell forward right back on top of her. Shen, he must weigh as much as a tree.

Alissa clawed at Donick's form, managing to slowly maneuver out from under him, the rain and mud having made them both slick.

She gasped when her ankle was roughly grasped. She rolled to her back, desperate to get away. Raising her foot she kicked over and over, hearing the grunts, feeling the hands as they grabbed at her legs trying to recapture her.

Donick's hand suddenly went to his nose where blood poured out.

Alissa scrambled to her feet. His fingers closed around the forgotten dagger, stopping her in her tracks.

"You spawn of the devil. I don't care how I take you back. You're going to pay!"

She saw the knife arcing above Donick's head, raised her arms to shield herself. Then she heard a pitiful moan. With regret Alissa saw Jeanetta was conscious. She wavered, need telling her to protect Jeanetta from the pain and anger flowing in the tent, but another part of her saying if she didn't stop Donick, there would be no reason to protect her.

Jeanetta took the decision from her when she lunged up and blocked Donick's arm with her own Sime strength. The knife went flying.

Jeanetta suddenly gasped then thrust her arms upward. A keening cry erupted from her throat and tentacles burst forth from their sheaths.

Alissa staggered to her feet, shoving her arms out in offering, but it was too late. Donick, regaining his balance, had surged forward, his hands going for Jeanetta's neck, his intent obvious in his flashing eyes.

He realized his position the moment Jeanetta's tentacles broke out. He started to pull back. But Jeanetta was already turning toward Alissa, lowering her arms, planning to use Alissa to satisfy her desperate craving for selyn.

Donick's arms bumped across Jeanetta's tentacles and she knew Donick's selyn field erupted with fear because Jeanetta turned toward him, ignoring Alissa as she tried to entice Jeanetta with her own field.

Alissa might have been able to still distract Jeanetta had Donick not panicked and tried to knock Jeanetta aside in his futile attempt to get away. His abrupt gestures startled Jeanetta into kill mode. Seeing Donick's increased fear and his growing struggles, Alissa feared there was no way to stop Jeanetta, but she had to try. Donick's eyes bulged in horror and with one last burst of adrenaline, he attempted to pull away. But his strength was puny compared to a Sime in kill mode. Alissa started toward Jeanetta, flaring enticement, but Jeanetta's tentacles had already established a firm hold, her mouth had already planted itself against Donick's who's was open in a scream that would never be heard. And, by the time Alissa's arms were fully extended, Donick's lifeless body was already slipping from Jeanetta's grip.

Seeing Jeanetta wasn't satisfied, Alissa realized Jeanetta must be a channel. She offered her arms again, prepared for transfer. And that's all the encouragement the junct Sime required. She lunged, jerking Alissa into her grip. Knowing the horribly violent death of Donick had caused Jeanetta's intense reaction, Alissa began to push her selyn into Jeanetta's starving system as fast as she could take it.

Alissa felt Jeanetta straining and knew she wanted something that she couldn't give her. Killbliss. She'd heard it mentioned at Carre. Those who had killed reached a peak they referred to as killbliss. But Alissa couldn't give Jeanetta that. So, very carefully, she attempted to flood the girl with the feeling of deep satisfaction as the peaking came and then very carefully eased her off.

Jeanetta collapsed against her, knocking them both to the ground.

Alissa heard the wail as Jeanetta realized what she'd done. But the dull throb in her head that had been only an inconvenience earlier blossomed out into a full blown pounding blocking out her thoughts. The world dimmed and with a moan, darkness envelope her.

"Tell me again why you think these people are going to accept me?"

Alissa watched as the young Sime waved her tentacles about in abject fascination. "This Household I'm taking you to has both Simes and Gens living together in peace." She shifted on her horse, tempted to rub her sore bottom, barely restraining herself. Soon they would be to Carre...less than half an hour at the most.

"But don't the Simes want to ... kill ... each month when their need becomes so great for selyn?"

Alissa heard the fear in the young girl's voice. "They learn not to kill. Believe me, Jeanetta, would I be in Sime Territory if I had no hope of surviving?"

Reluctantly, Jeanetta nodded. "But I've killed." The whisper was so faint Alissa almost didn't catch it. She shifted on the horse, grumbling under her breath when the darned animal swung it's head around and snapped at her. She hated horses, hated riding for any length of time, and especially hated this particular horse who seemed to have it out for her.

"They can help you stop killing. That's what a Companion is for." Alissa wasn't sure how else to reassure Jeanetta. She was just going to have to wait until they arrived at Carre. Soon now, very very soon and they'd be there and then she'd be off this beast.

"And you're a Companion?"

"I was training to be one before I left." The wind whipped Alissa's hair into her face. Looking up at the sky, she realized with dismay that it was going to rain--again. She'd been wet this whole trip. Her face was black and blue, her whole body ached from the beating she'd taken from Donick and the uncomfortable ride had her so stiff she would fall on her face if she tried to dismount.

And now it was going to rain.

She sighed. Maybe twenty-five minutes left. Just twenty-five minutes.

"And a Companion is a Gen, a special Gen that isn't scared of Simes who can work with a Sime...no, not just a Sime but a special Sime called a channel, right?"

Alissa nodded, abstractly, peering through the deepening gloom. "That's right. But stop worrying. You'll learn all of this in time. After all, you're a channel too. You're going to be one of those special Simes who can take selyn from a Gen without hurting them and give that selyn to other Simes who must have it."

"I never knew the craving would be like that," Jeanetta whispered.

Alissa sighed. She had been raised on the Sime side of the border. She wasn't use to this reaction. All the people she had known considered it the norm to changeover. Only ones like her, that established as a Gen, were upset and feared for their lives.

Thank goodness Tannon had found her when he had.

Tannon.

She wouldn't think of him right now. She had to concentrate on getting the young junct channel to Carre. Twenty minutes. Just twenty more minutes and she could get off this brute that passed for transportation. She would swear it was bouncing worse than any other horse just to spite her. Every bump jostled her. She did her best to contain her pain, but could tell when she wasn't controlling it because Jeanetta would wince in reaction. No new channel should have to go through this.

Jeanetta sat up on her horse, her eyes going unfocused. "I saw something. A flash. I'm not sure."

Alissa turned her attention to the young girl. "Where? Which way?" She envied a Sime their differences. They could zlin--or see--energy fields before a Gen could see the person. They could run faster too--augmenting--and easily overtaking a Gen. They also had an ability to tell where they were at all times. Simes never got lost. And with their warmer body temperature, they didn't get as cold either, like Alissa was right now. Whereas Gens functioned on calories, Simes functioned on selyn. Gens thought of them as gods, as super beings who used Gens as animals, stripping them of their selyn and leaving them dead. Alissa had learned better from Householders.

"I'm not sure. Maybe I didn't zlin--"

"Jeanetta. Don't worry. You're still learning." Reluctantly, thinking of the delay this would make them getting to Carre, Alissa said, "Let's go check it out."

Jeanetta turned the horse in the direction she'd seen something. They cut across the field, through the woods and down a slope where there was a huge rocky decline. She recognized this area.

Jeanetta pulled up. Wrapping her coat around her neck she slipped off the horse and began to creep forward through the rocks. Alissa shivered, rolled her eyes at her horse who was suddenly eyeing her like she was it's next snack, and clumsily slid off it's back. She hated horses.

As if sensing her dislike, the horse turned knocking her sideways, making her stumble. Jeanetta was immediately there, grabbing her. "Shhh," she whispered.

Leave it to a new Sime to correct a Gen. Jeanetta had probably been just as clumsy before changeover. They started forward, Alissa muttering under her breath at the horse.

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing," Alissa replied. "I guess I'm just tired. We should have been to Carre by now." She didn't add that it hurt to walk. She grimaced and hobbled behind the graceful Sime, wondering what Jeanetta could have zlinned. Things couldn't get any worse.

Then the rain hit her. Cold and nasty, it started slowly as big fat drops and in seconds was a steady downpour. It slithered past her torn collar, down her skin in rivulets. She shuddered in distaste. Her bottom was already so sore she couldn't walk straight. Her legs would never straighten up again. And now she was going to be rubbed raw by the saddle. She was certain her horse would smile if it had any idea how much pain it was causing her. "Any idea what you did see?" Alissa whispered, wanting to hurry on to Carre and get out of the downpour. Simes didn't get as cold, and she sometimes had to wonder if any weather affected them as Jeanetta slinked silently forward to a vantage point where she could see below her without any show of discomfort.

When Alissa knelt beside Jeanetta and peered down at what Jeanetta had zlinned earlier, she was glad she hadn't hurried the girl. She could barely contain her gasp.

"Who do you think they are?" Jeanetta whispered, crouching down behind the rocks so as not to be spotted or zlinned by the group below.

Alissa hunkered deeper in her coat to get some protection against the pouring rain. "I'm not sure about those," Alissa motioned toward a group of four Simes who stood belligerently facing off a Sime and Gen despite the increase of the rain. "That, however," she added, nodding slightly to the other group talking over the sudden boom of thunder, "is Sectuib Tannon ambrov Carre and a Gen is with him," she added the last unnecessarily to the Sime beside her who could zlin the difference in them even if she hadn't been able to see it. "Probably his Companion."

Alissa could barely make out the shapes through the sudden thunderstorm, but she could pick out the smooth arms of a Gen. And she'd know Tannon despite his tentacles and the blue and silver of Carre's colors anywhere.

Wiping the water from her face, she cursed silently. Five maybe ten more minutes and they would have been at Carre. Alissa was glad she had insisted they travel cross-country on their way back from out-Territory. Because of that decision they were now shielded by the rocks instead of on the rutted road where they would have already been zlinned, unaware of the confrontation taking place below, possibly riding into a viper's nest bent on no good.

Sometimes Alissa wished she had the special ability to zlin so she could see the things her Gen's eyes couldn't pick up until she was right on top of the problem.

She couldn't tell who the Companion was with Tannon, but knew Sectuib wouldn't leave Carre without one. She also didn't know what Tannon was doing out in the rain, but knew he wouldn't be away from Carre if it wasn't an emergency. He was the head of the Household, the most important person to Carre, and he was always to be protected.

She looked at the injured Sime lying unconscious at Sectuib's feet. The way Tannon stood so closely, she would guess it was one of Carre's own people. Perhaps they were on their way back to Carre and had been waylaid like the time she and Tannon had been detained, she thought, remembering the horror they had gone through only four months ago. Four months, yet it seemed like a lifetime.

Having established, she'd been running for her life to Gen Territory. Antoch, a man who had betrayed her mother and had murdered her was after her to put her in the pens. He had almost caught up with her when she'd stumbled upon a group of Simes and Gens, a group of Householders. They'd protected her, blocking the way of her pursuers until she could get away. Later she'd found out only Tannon had survived of that whole group. Antoch had murdered them all, including Tannon's Secutib and Tannon's Companion right in front of him. It had been a miracle he had escaped though he hadn't been in bast of shape.

It had been unfortunate he'd stumbled into the Shrine of the Starred Cross where she was hiding. However, it had been fortunate for her. He'd taught her not to fear Simes, that it was the fear itself that was dangerous. What a lesson to learn too. Antoch had caught up with them and imprisoned them in a small cage, intending to let Tannon's supply of selyn run out so he would die of attrition. They knew by putting a scared Gen and a Sime in a cage together Tannon would either be provoked into killing the Gen, which was forbidden by the Households, or he would commit suicide. Oh, yes, they'd planned to see her dead and the ruination of the House of Carre at the same time. The scandal of what Tannon would have done would have brought the wrath of Norlea down on Carre's head. The local town would not have left a stone of Carre unturned.

But they hadn't counted on Tannon's persuasive words or the trust he'd inspired in Alissa. Alissa felt connected to Tannon in a way she couldn't explain. And when he'd asked her to trust him, she had, finally shown her trust in the deepest way possible, giving herself to Tannon when he was in desperate need. He'd taken transfer from her, and they'd both lived. Keon had rescued them from Antoch, who had vowed to fight another day and ridden off. Alissa had traveled to Carre with Tannon, basking in the warmth and learning about the Household Carre, though she'd never intended to stay beyond a month or more. At the time she had truly believed the only way for a Gen to be really free was if they lived in their own Gen Territory. How wrong she'd been. How she wanted to tell Tannon that now.

Just then Alissa was jerked back to the present when one of the angry Simes grabbed Tannon by the arm and propelled him across the clearing toward the horses that were tethered to some nearby trees.

"He's trying to reason with them," Alissa hissed as she watched Tannon raise a conciliatory hand, a motion she well recognized as a let's-talk-this-over gesture. Casually he reached up and wiped the hair from his face as if he wasn't facing an angry Sime from town--or worse, a raider.

"Doesn't he know they won't reason?"

His tentacled hand went up in the air as if forestalling an accusation.

"They're really angry," Jeanetta whispered, using her new abilities to zlin the emotions of the group below.

"And they're going to hurt Sectuib," Alissa added shivering. "Probably leave the other Sime to die," she said, thinking of the unconscious Sime on the ground.

"What are we going to do?" Jeanetta asked. She stiffened, her head suddenly whipping around as she zlinned off to their left. "There's a large group of Simes coming. From their position your Sectuib isn't going to see them until it's too late."

"A trap!" Alissa exclaimed and stood. "Come on. We've got to help."

"How?" Jeanetta returned, bewildered.

Alissa looked around. "We'll get on the horses and ride right between the two groups. The disruption will give Tannon a chance to get away. We'll have to get the Sime on the ground--"

"But--"

"Don't argue. If these people are raiders I wouldn't leave a dead animal behind for them to get their filthy hands on." Not to mention an injured Householder, she added silently, knowing how raiders loved to torture to death their captives just for the fun of it.

"They're getting closer."

"Come on. Let's do it."

Alissa painfully mounted the horse.

With a cry of warning, they charged down the hill and into camp. Simes scattered in every direction. Shouts erupted. "Get out of here! Trap!" Alissa shouted.

"Watch out!" Tannon called, but too late. The Sime's came after them, fury written in their features.

"Run!" Alissa replied as she and Jeanetta raced toward the downed Sime. "Get out of here. More are coming! We'll get the Sime."

The enraged Simes had split into two groups. One group was headed toward Tannon and the Companion and another started toward her and Jeanetta. "Don't!" Tannon called, anger plainly written on his face. "Leave him!"

Alissa ignored Tannon and together she and Jeanetta hauled the unconscious Sime onto her horse. She knew Tannon was worried about the Sime's displacement. No Sime who was unconscious should ever be moved. That ability that let him know where he was all the time would be off kilter when he awoke. The displacement could be so severe between what his unconscious mind was telling him as compared to what his eyes were telling him that he would wish for death, but Alissa was more worried about the Sime being tortured. She'd seen too much torture in the last week to let an innocent suffer again, no matter what the cost.

"Ride!" Alissa said even as the other group came into camp.

Tannon shouted something again but it was snatched away by the turbulent storm. Just then two dozen riders broke through the clearing on the far side. He shouted again, something that sounded like Carre and their horse shot forward.

"Follow him," Alissa ordered the Sime, knowing she could follow easily even though Alissa, as a Gen, was unable to see through the now blinding rain.

Jeanetta rode through the line of horses scattering them. Alissa realized holding the extra body on her horse was slowing her down. However, despite her horse's wheezing, Jeanetta's horse was faltering. It was in bad shape. It was much older than the horse Alissa currently rode. Alissa tried to keep track of Tannon but he'd disappeared from view. "Can you zlin him?" she asked Jeanetta.

"Yes. He's still there, far ahead."

Thundering hooves echoed behind the two riders on the tiring mounts. Alissa cast a desperate glance over her shoulder, peering through the shrouded forest which hid the hunters from her Gen view.

"Hurry, Jeanetta. They're gaining," she cried even as the young Sime leaned further over her horse's neck and urged it to a faster speed.

The Gen glanced back again, moving with the sway of the horse as the other woman expertly dodged trees in their path. Alissa clawed at the strands of hair the wind whipped into her face. She attempted to clear her vision, as she squinted behind her to see any sign of their would-be captors. Her heart pounded loud in her ears with her own fear and she was certain she wouldn't hear their attackers' approach over the wild beating.

"Who are they? What do they want?"

"I don't know!" Alissa cried out. Swinging her head back around so her voice wouldn't be carried away by the rumbling thunder she shouted over the noise, "Hunters, bandits, raiders; I'm not sure. Just be glad that Sectuib and his Companion were able to get away!"

"There they are!" a triumphant voice shouted causing Alissa to cast another fearful glance over her shoulder, her apprehensive eyes searching. The Simes who doggedly persevered on their quest of satisfaction as they hounded the two helpless travelers could see what she couldn't because of the dark shadows. She cursed her Gen sight under her breath.

Suddenly, a brief glimpse of a horse informed her that their mounts were losing too much ground.

"Hurry!" she urged, knowing the young junct channel's horsemanship was superb and she was getting everything she could out of her lathered mount. Even now Alissa could hear the harsh wheezing of her own horse and regretted the way they had to push it to the limits of its endurance. Yet her terror the people would catch them if they slowed precluded her from allowing herself or Jeanetta to slow their mounts.

Jeanetta's tense voice cut through Alissa's thoughts of concern for the horses. "There's something up ahead. A stone wall. It's on the other side of an open field!"

Excitement surged in Alissa. "That's it! That's Carre!"

A shot rang out and Alissa held on tighter, leaning into her mount, Jeanetta cut her horse sharp to the right around a large tree heading for the small wooden bridge. Alissa suddenly screamed as a branch caught her flying hair.

Her hands clawed at her reins attempting to hold on and not lose her seat. The hedge, which represented safety in Alissa's mind was only moments away, just across the bridge separating the forest and stream from the wide opened field. She had to make it! She teetered and the horse faltered. She felt herself falling and fought desperately, but at that moment a second branch caught her. Pain sliced through her face and chest and she thought, I'm going to die. Then steel-like tentacles were around her upper arm and she was hauled back to the safety of her horse.

Alissa sucked in a sharp breath against the pain. "I'm okay," she reassured. She knew she couldn't mask all of her pain and she didn't want to excite the new Sime into doing something drastic that would see the end to both of their lives. She instead concentrated on the good news that Carre was in sight and they would soon be safe.

Jeanetta calmed even as their horses pounded across the bridge that crossed the small river.

Alissa gripped the reins as the horse leapt the small hedge that traveled almost the entire width of the field.

She'd not come all the way from out-Territory where Gens ruled to Carre in Sime Territory only to fail so close. She would make it back to Carre with her junct channel and unconscious Sime in tow.

A junct channel.

Carre would be both thrilled and devastated.

Thrilled because a channel was a special kind of Sime who could be trained to take selyn from a Gen without killing them and then give that selyn to other Simes who required it every month to live. And they needed more channels. When she left they'd been desperate for them.

But they would also be devastated because Jeanetta was junct. She had killed a Gen for selyn. It'd take a lot of hard work to help Jeanetta learn not to hurt a Gen now. She would have to go through crisis where she would ultimately choose to kill or break away from the kill. Many couldn't make it through that. But at least there was still hope for Jeanetta. She would be at Carre, the best place as far as Alissa was concerned, to help Jeanetta through her difficulties. Yes, there was help for Jeanetta there...and a place for Alissa too. So she would make it there.

There were too many things left unsaid. She had to make amends with Tannon for what had happened after he'd brought her back to Carre to live. She had to make it up for running out on Carre, on him. She had to tell him he was right. Out Territory wasn't what she had been looking for. Her life was at Carre. She wanted to pledge herself to serving the Household and Tannon as Sectuib. She had to tell him that.

When they passed the old ruins of a House, Alissa's heart rate accelerated. Almost home.

"They've seen us!" Jeanetta exclaimed, urging the horse to push harder. Alissa wondered if Jeanetta even realized that, because of the rain, Alissa still couldn't see Carre.

"They're opening the gates! Your Sectuib is inside! Your Sectuib is inside!"

Even as the stone structure came into view, Alissa glanced anxiously over her shoulder. Out loud she reassured, "They won't follow us further. Carre has grown too much. Besides, it's been years since an attack was launched against Carre."

Alissa wasn't sure for who's benefit she said those words, but they proved true.

Racing toward the entrance of the smooth gray stone walls, Alissa felt a surge of victory, of homecoming. True it'd only been a short time since she'd been behind these walls, but to her, looking at the welcoming sight of the Simes and Gens as they came running, it seemed like eternity. With anticipation she remembered the quiet, tranquil atmosphere and the camaraderie of the people who lived here. Funny, she hadn't noticed that until after she'd insisted to Sectuib Tannon Ambrov Carre that she didn't want to live behind walls but wanted to go where she would be free and able to have a family.

Well, Gen Territory hadn't turned out to be the paradise she'd sought, but the opposite side of the warped piece of metal. Instead of Gens dying, Simes were ruthlessly hunted and murdered. And now she was back with a people she'd left; but this would be better than dwelling with a people who lived in fear of their own children.

Which brought her to Jeanetta, a failure she didn't want to dwell on until she faced Tannon.

Suddenly, Jeanetta's horse faltered, staggering like it was drunk. Alissa realized the horse was done for. Jeanetta, more agile with her Sime abilities jumped, somersaulting away as the horse tumbled and went down. But Alissa was slower. She couldn't turn her horse in time. It crashed into Jeanetta's own mount. And as a result she went flying toward the crowd of Simes and Gens that was racing toward them.

I'm going to have some mad Simes. She thought dismally of the shock her impact with the cold unyielding earth would cause. The ground rushed up toward her. Pain! her mind screamed and she closed her eyes. But instead of pain and hard soil, she landed with a thump against warm steel with arms that caught and held her close.

Her head cracked against someone's chin and she saw stars. She wasn't sure but thought she might taste blood too from biting her tongue. She pushed back and looked up into the furious brown eyes of Sectuib Tannon ambrov Carre.

All was silent as she stared at his face. It seemed an eternity since she'd stood like this with Tannon. Easily six inches taller than her own average height, his features were strong, angular with prominent cheekbones, a square chin, classical nose and two long dimples, one on each side of his mouth when he smiled--which he wasn't doing now. She watched his features slowly change from furious to remote and closed. So long Alissa had thought of him and wondered what her homecoming would be like. She hadn't dreamed it would be anything like this. She had wondered what to say when she saw him, how she would explain her feelings. But now, standing here, leaning against him as he held her in his arms, she froze.

He pushed her away slightly, breaking the spell. This time when Alissa looked at him she saw more than just the fond memories of a handsome man. She saw his stress too. Dark shadows lay under his eyes, the sharp cheekbones were sharper than normal, showing he'd lost weight, and the tense way he clamped his jaw revealed lines instead of dimples. Uneasy, she blanked her field and was glad she had when he spoke.

"I never thought to see you again."

The sarcastic words struck like a dagger. She pulled back to break contact. Tannon didn't try to hold onto her, stepping back himself.

Ignoring her, he turned and jogged to where the horses had fallen. Calling to a passing Sime, she said, "The Sime I brought in. Help him."

Without waiting to see that he did, for a crowd was already around the body and carrying it off, she followed Tannon. He noted the people carrying off the other Sime, but instead of following them, he went to where the horses were. Kneeling down by Jeanetta's horse, he nodded. "Dead." He turned toward her horse.

She stepped forward. The horse snapped at her.

Scowling at it, she jumped back. Tannon examined it's legs. "It'll be a good addition to the stables."

"It's a hindrance," Alissa muttered, knowing how evil the horse could be when it wanted to. What really irked her though was how the horse stood still and allowed Tannon to stroke it's neck. It would have taken her hand off if she'd tried that.

"A lot you know about horses," the young female stable master said, taking the reins from Tannon and heading off. Alissa watched it trot docilely behind the young Sime and wanted to smack the horse for it's attitude.

Had Tannon not turned toward her at that moment, she might have given in to the urge. She was certain even the hairs on her head hurt, if that were possible. And that horse was part of the reason. But Tannon did turn. She focused on him, doing her best to hide her pain, though it was almost impossible to hide anything from this channel. But instead of commenting on her condition or her obvious pain, Tannon said bluntly, "What brought you here this time? Running from Simes again?"

As if he didn't know, Alissa thought, shocked by his unfriendly welcome.

She glanced around and saw all of the once friendly faces staring at her now with a wariness that she'd never noticed before. Although she'd only been gone a few months, they were acting like it had been years and they had forgotten who she was.

"Well?"

The impatience in Tannon's voice brought her eyes snapping back to his. But before she could reply, Jeanetta stepped forward. "It was for me that she returned."

Tannon turned and zlinned the girl quickly and Alissa knew Tannon wondered how the girl had understood. She doubted Jeanetta had actually understood. But anyone, know matter what language they spoke, could certainly understand a dressing down.. "A kill in the last day or so. A channel." It was said quietly as if an accusation. Turning back to Alissa he continued, "You're nowhere near low field. Your field isn't high either. And she's junct besides. Care to explain?"

She had just been chased for her life, was hurting and injured, exhausted with a junct channel by her side and he was questioning her like she'd committed a grave offense. Which, she admitted only to herself, she had. Jeanetta was junct. But she wouldn't admit her failure to him here before everyone. Instead, she allowed her anger to build as a self-defense.

"Aren't you going to do anything about those people who chased us?" she questioned unbelievably.

Tannon blinked and Alissa realized he hadn't even considered the people chasing them. What was going on here? Tannon was a good channel and a very good Sectuib. He was acting like a first year Sime who couldn't concentrate on anything.

He leveled her a look and turned to Lemel, a Gen standing by his side. "Get a riding party together. We'll see what we can find of them, although I'm sure they're long gone by now."

"But, Tannon," Lemel began. "Perhaps you should send someone else. You're required here--"

"No. I'm going. I'm Sectuib and fully capable of leading a searching expedition. Besides, after what she just did --"

She could tell he was angry again the way his face flushed.

"No," he said, slashing his hand through the air. "I will not discuss that right now." With only a brief glance at Alissa he turned toward the stables for a fresh mount. "I'll finish this when I return."

Alissa watched him stride away, unable to believe this was the same confident young Sectuib she'd known only a few short months ago. Trembling, she reached up and brushed her hair from her face, noting the twigs and leaves entwined within the long brown strands.

Katrin, the Sime in charge of the first year changeovers came forward. "Let's go get you cleaned up, dear," she said to Jeanetta.

Jeanetta's eyes widened and she gripped Alissa's hand. Alissa immediately forgot her own appearance and attempted to soothe Jeanetta as she smoothed the hair from her friend's face. "It's okay, Jeanetta. You'll love the Sime's housing. Go on."

"You won't leave me?" she questioned and Alissa suddenly realized the fear the young girl must be feeling.

Alissa had felt that herself the first time she'd gone to Gen Territory after establishing; the feeling of total abandonment, knowing no one, discovering a whole new life. And here was Jeanetta who had been raised to hate and fear Simes. Less than two days old, Jeanetta still occasionally looked at her tentacles with revulsion. Alissa was certain Jeanetta was remembering with horror how she had attacked a man and killed him, a man she had known for most of her life. Alissa had assured her she was not some demon or monster. Yet it would take time for her to adjust. Still, it must be a shock to have all of these tentacled people wandering around about her so freely when in Gen Territory, a tentacled person was immediately executed.

Alissa reached out and stroked a dorsal tentacle on Jeanetta's forearm. She said quietly, "Never. I'll always be here for you."

Hesitantly, Jeanetta nodded before finally leaving with Katrin. When she was gone Alissa returned her attention to the crowd. She was very self-conscious when she realized a majority of the people had broken up into small groups and were whispering. She was glad she couldn't zlin fields for she was certain the dark looks and whispers were aimed at her.

"Let's get you to the infirmary and examine you. You look like you've been riding under the horse instead of on it." If only he knew, thought Alissa.

Alissa looked up into the hazel eyes of Jorgre who had been standing nearby, giving orders to some of the others who were loitering. Although he was not much taller than her, Jorgre had an air about him that reeked of authority. Was he now working closely with Tannon? His slim Sime body was graceful as he quickly maneuvered her past the staring crowd and stables, past the dorms and finally into the main building which housed the offices, cafeteria, and a infirmary for minor injuries.

She touched her battered face, remembering how Donick had beat her only two days past intending to murder her before Jeanetta had attacked and killed him. She reassured herself that this was the reason everyone was staring at her. "It's true I look pretty roughed up," she said and tried to smile. "But it's a story I'd prefer not to discuss. I'd rather wait and tell the Sectuib first."

She felt Jorgre stiffen and wondered at it but didn't pursue it. Instead, she changed the subject. "We rode into camp breaking up the group and giving Tannon a chance to escape. We were right behind the Sectuib though our horses were slowed down. We weren't sure we were going to make it. But as you saw, Jeanetta's horse didn't give out until we passed through the gates." She thought about the poor beast they'd run into the ground. "And of course, Jeanetta's nerves are a mess. A new channel should never have to go through what she did."

Jorgre escorted her into the room, his face remote. The room was much like she remembered. Tan thick drapes to block out any and all sun when necessary, the walls close to the same tan color with very few decorations on them, all muted so as not to irritate a patient. Today the drapes were open allowing the gray cast of the sky to seep into the room. The wooden examination table was well padded, with bars that could be raised on either side if the patient was unconscious. A small wooden table with various supplies stood next to the bed. The craftsmanship was superb, with carvings of vines up the side of the wood holding the tray in place. Simple but beautiful. Cabinets kept locked with simple medicines in it was against the wall next to the sink. Alissa was suddenly uneasy at the lengthening silence. "Jorgre," she said as he helped her up onto the table, "what's going on here?"

Jorgre shrugged. "It's not the same since you left."

Surprised by the remark, for Jorgre had only arrived weeks before Alissa, she said, "It can't have changed that much. You know the motto, Unity through peace."

"Well, you wouldn't know that with all the trouble we've been having."

"What do you mean?" she asked as Jorgre helped her off with her top and examined her bruised ribs, his hands and tentacles touching gently as he zlinned her injuries.

"I mean, since Tannon came back from meeting you months ago he has changed. His focus is different, especially since you...well, anyway, he's different. He never did share what happened out on the trail with you. People want to know exactly what happened to the former Sectuib and why you suddenly decided to leave. There's even been rumors that Tannon just can't handle the stress. He's too focused on himself and keeping us here inside and safe. The programs he'd once thought to implement about going out to the people, working among them to teach them about our unity and peace have all stopped."

"That's not true," Alissa exclaimed, eyeing Jorgre with suspicious eyes. A superior attitude indeed, she thought. This channel obvio usly didn't like Tannon. She would set him straight right now.

She remembered the ice storm and running for her life and thought everyone here should know of it. "Tannon found me. The former Sectuib gave his life saving me and Tannon risked his own life too. True, Keon eventually saved us, but I would be dead were it not for Sectuib Tannon ambrov Carre. Tannon even asked me to be his Companion. I didn't understand Householdings. Instead of pledging, I left for Gen Territory, certain to find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow I was hunting."

Her voice turned bitter as she remembered Tannon's anguished reaction to her leaving and her time spent out-Territory. "Too late I realized that perhaps here was where I belonged."

Jorgre, eyeing her differently--whether that was good or bad she wasn't sure--went to the cabinet and pulled out a vial. Pouring it into a glass he brought it back and proffered it to her with two tentacles.

She wrinkled her now at the sharp pungent smell but downed the fosebine anyway, grimacing at its awful taste. "Maybe if I had known more about Householdings," she said, trying to make Jorgre understand, "I wouldn't have run scared. Maybe I would have stayed." She shrugged. Looking at Jorgre she continued more strongly, meaning to make Jorgre understand. "I owe Tannon and Carre my trust and service."

"Tannon ambrov Carre isn't in very good shape, if you didn't notice," Jorgre said taking the glass from her and rinsing it out in the sink. He continued, "Since you've been gone, Tannon has been experiencing aborts and all kind of other problems. He's definitely not at his best."

Guilt pierced her soul. Although Jorgre hadn't said it was her fault, she couldn't forget how sour his post had gone after their transfer when she'd told him she was leaving. Could all of this be her fault? And who was serving him? It couldn't be Lemel for he wasn't strong enough. Maybe Katrin?

"We require a good First Companion. Your field is strong. I heard Tannon say you weren't at peak. We must have someone like you here who could serve Tannon," he paused then added a last phrase so softly she almost didn't hear.

No, she could not have heard right. "What did you say?"

"You'll see," he said, but she knew that wasn't true at all. He had said or me right after he'd said she could serve Tannon. What could have caused such an uproar that easy going Jorgre would be talking about ousting Tannon? Tannon couldn't be in that bad a shape, could he?

"The room across from the Sectuib's is empty. Why don't you go up there and rest. As you heard the Sectuib say, he'll want to see you when he returns." He turned his back on her dismissing her.

Alissa gingerly slid down off the table and went out the door. At the base of the steps was her bag. She picked it up and wearily climbed the stairs. The fosebine was already taking affect, for which she was thankful. Going to her room, she unpacked. Although it had only been a few months, it felt like she'd been running for years. Even though her life had been threatened, she'd known she was coming home when she had spotted the gates of Carre. The memory of walking through the compound, the people smiling and waving, standing together laughing over what one of the students had done or some prank that had been pulled...She'd always been included like she belonged, until today.

She didn't feel like she was home now. The people had pulled away, uneasy, whispering, eyeing with speculation both her and Tannon.

She went to the small basin and washed up, doing her best to get rid of all traces of grime and blood. She ached from head to toe, but thanks to the fosebine her aches were now barely noticeable. She should really be lying down, but she wanted to talk to Tannon, find out how the injured Sime was, see what she would be doing to help.

A knock sounded and this time it was a muddy Lemel who stood at the door. "Tannon wants to see you."

Alissa nodded. In minutes, dressed in her own sky blue skirt and white top with the lacy collar, she was downstairs outside Tannon's door. She took a deep calming breath then gently knocked.

"Come in." The deep vibrant voice was the same as she remembered except maybe a little strained.

Alissa opened the door and made her way across the plush carpet that insulated her steps. The scene was similar to the last time she was here, except the mugginess of the office made it stifling. Two large balcony doors were pushed open to help cool the office. The smell of rain drifted in. In the distance she could see people going about their duties, rushing from place to place to get out of the rain. Glancing around the familiar room, she noted several plants looked like they hadn't been watered in a couple of weeks.

Tannon and his plants. The upkeep of his plants mirrored his moods. When he was agitated or near need the plants suffered. If he was energetic and happy, his plants showed the results of his exuberance. Alissa had gotten into the habit of checking them the short time she had stayed here. Obviously, no one else had. The bookcases behind his desk were still full of books, including the one on Householdings that she'd always meant to read. She wondered what Tannon would do if she walked over there, turned the key, and pulled out the treasured volume to read. Before she left he would have been happy. But now? She saw Tannon staring at her, his features blank. "Why don't you tell me what happened?"

Alissa made her way over to one of the two overstuffed chairs in front of the huge wooden desk and perched on one. She brushed her hair back over her shoulder before carefully folding her hands in her lap. Lifting her eyes she gazed steadily at the man before her and replied, "Jeanetta went through changeover and I helped her across the border. I was attacked by a tree just outside Carre," she added the last as a joke, trying to ease the tension.

It didn't work.

When she didn't say anything else, Tannon stood. He stomped around the desk and faced her, angrily splaying a shaky hand through his unruly black hair before bracing them on the desk behind him. Alissa was certain he was attempting to hide the telltale sign of his weakness, for in the short time she'd known Tannon, she'd never seen anything except rock hard stability. Yet he was now trembling.

"So, that explains everything?" he asked softly, but she heard the steely anger. "Your face. Shen, Alissa, I can't even see one of your eyes. Your lower lip is blue. Did the horse trample you? Because you certainly didn't get these bruises with that clumsy Gen stunt out front. I was there, remember?

"And the junct channel? Your field isn't at peak, yet not low. You certainly haven't served someone unless it was a shen. No. You don't look like that has happened." He started to pace but stopped and whirled back around to face her.

"Come on, Alissa. What are you hiding? Earlier you were covered with blood, and your clothes were practically ripped off you. The scratches from a tree limb are obvious. Tell me what happened!" he finished, striding forward to the edge of the nice plump chair next to where she was seated and placing himself in the empty one.

He was certainly upset. Evidently he'd had plenty of time to ruminate on this and had already judged her. But Alissa was more concerned about what she saw in him. What was the matter that Tannon would act so unstable? Eyes filled with concern but etched with strain demanded answers. The sound of rain filled the uneasy silence, punctuating her hesitation in answering. For the first time since knowing Tannon, her confidence wavered. She had been so sure she could come in here, be a Companion, step in where she had left off. But right now she wasn't sure how to handle him. One wrong word might trigger those turbulent emotions that he held barely in check. She was relieved when the door opened and Lemel strode in carrying a tray of food. He immediately set the tray on the desk, moved up next to Tannon and touched his elbow. Was his Companion sick? she wondered, unwilling to believe what her eyes were seeing.

Alissa licked her lower lip, feeling the distorted flesh with her tongue, forcing herself back to the question he'd posed, wondering how to answer. "How do I explain about the crazed fanatic who beat me and tried to rape me?"

"What!" Tannon gasped, his gaze sharpening. He leaned forward, concern etched on his deeply lined face.

She shrugged remembering now how she had looked when she'd been running for her life. She realized that must be why Tannon hadn't thanked her yet for saving his life. He was worried about their arrival. She was making a mess of this. She cast a glare at Lemel for help, but his full concentration was on Tannon.

Alissa remembered in their desperate flight she'd forgotten her state of dress, her clothes hanging off her, the bruises, everything. She'd been more concerned with her young charge and staying alive. "We ran into some trouble --"

At his snort indicating a vast understatement, she shot him a disgruntled look. "There was a man. Well, actually, his name was Donick. He wanted --"

Grief filled her as she remembered the past three months. Had she not encouraged Donick to be friends with her, he might be alive today. Possibly, Jeanetta wouldn't be junct. The past twenty-four hours all came back and tears welled in her swollen eyes. Her cheeks flushed at the embarrassing display of emotion.

Tannon stiffened. Lemel stepped slightly in front of him, attempting to shield Tannon from her emotions but failing miserably. She saw Tannon's face whiten and his mouth tighten. She swallowed several times trying to stop the flood of tears that was right at the surface but all of her feelings over the past months continued to flood her. She'd hurt Tannon emotionally when she'd decided to go to Gen Territory, endangered Leonie--Jeanetta's mother--and caused Donick's death--not that she was horribly guilt-ridden over the last--but she was not over her guilt of being unable to stop Jeanetta from killing him. Jeanetta shouldn't be junct and it was Alissa's fault. She knew, without being told, that she'd failed in the role of a Companion. Jeanetta should never have had to go through what she did or what she would yet have to face.

"I'm waiting." It was said impatiently. Alissa forced her emotions aside, refusing to hurt this channel any more than she already had. She stared ahead at the shelves of books located against the walls behind Tannon's desk. She let out a deep shuddering breath.

"Well?" he persisted.

"He was the pastor's son of the local Church of Purity. He-we-well, I broke off our engagement." Tannon's eyes widened then narrowed and she felt as if she had somehow hurt him with that information. She was being ridiculous. In her emotional state she couldn't be sure of anything. "He was crazy, fanatical, and he came after me. Jeanetta was going through changeover and I promised to help her get to Sime Territory. We were only an hour from the border, but I was afraid to go further, afraid Jeanetta wouldn't have enough selyn for breakout.

"It was storming. I didn't hear him. Jeanetta---maybe she didn't realize what she was zlinning until Donick was at the tent. He knocked her unconscious. We fought. He tried to ra ... hurt me." Alissa gulped, remembering the terror that had filled her, the surety they were going to die. "Jeanetta--she stopped him. She went through breakout and I offered ... Shuven, Tannon," she whispered. "It was too late. Donick was there and when he tried to escape, he brushed against Jeanetta's extended laterals."

Alissa shivered in remembrance. "She wasn't satisfied with Donick, so I finished the transfer. She cried, terrified that you, the people of Carre, wouldn't accept her after she'd done something so atrocious. We talked but --"

"That explains Jeanetta's presence. But what about yours?"

Alissa shrugged and began to pluck at her skirt. When she realized what she was doing she quickly folded her hands again. She lifted her head and locked stares with Tannon. "I realize I was wrong in running away. I didn't understand. But I do now. I want to stay here myself and pledge." It took a lot of courage, but she refused to lower her eyes and grovel.

Tannon shot her a disbelieving look. "Why? Didn't you like out-Territory?" He shook his head, disgust on his features. "You can't run back to us every time you have a problem. You made your decision months ago."

Alissa's mouth fell open and heat stained her cheeks red at his words. Surely he didn't mean he was going to send her back out-Territory? A chill seized her. That would be no better than casting her outside the walls and telling her to fend for herself. "But I've changed my mind."

Tannon placed his fists on his hips and stared deeply into her eyes. His voice hoarse and laced with bitterness he asked softly, "How soon before you change it again?"

"But I want to pledge." The whisper was more of a plea than a demand and Alissa couldn't believe she was actually begging.

Tannon laughed, but his bitterness was traced with a despair that frightened Alissa. "I'd be a fool to take your pledge and put the people of Carre at risk should you suddenly decide you can't live behind these walls contentedly. I'm not willing to risk that again. I can't trust you to be here. You don't even understand what Carre is about."

Unity and Peace. She might not have before. But she did now. Didn't she?

"I was wrong," she whispered, unable to accept what he was saying. "I want to stay and help."

Tannon turned and started around his desk. "It's too late. Because, although you may be serious now, I don't think you'll be here in a week or two. You're still chasing rainbows, Alissa. You've not truly accepted what we are yet. There's still too much uncertainty in your life, and in your past, for me to trust you. Unity, Alissa. We are a people who work together. When its good or bad we stick together. Our Household couldn't make it if we didn't. And that means obeying an order, no matter what. That's what a Companion does, listens to his Sectuib. Rules and roles. A Companion has both. You never learned that."

"Gee," she said, finally letting her temper get the better of her, wanting to strike out against him for bruising her pride. "Aren't you even going to thank me for saving your life?."

Tannon whirled back around. "What do you mean?"

"Back in the clearing," she replied, totally disgusted with his anger. She had expected him to be a little irate, but nothing like this. "I've been through the very devil to get back here. Jeanetta and I spied you and Lemel, then risked our own lives to rescue you, yet you are still furious with me saying I have no idea how to follow orders or what unity means."

Tannon's features darkened. "Come to my rescue? And just what were you rescuing me form, Alissa?"

She looked from Tannon to Lemel who was again holding Tannon's elbow trying to calm him. Although he was woefully inadequate, he was at least, having a little affect on Tannon. Tannon now looked like he only wanted to toss her out instead of throttle her.

"Those Simes," she started.

"The ones we were talking with," he replied flatly.

"Well, yes," she said, "We saw you trying to reason with them."

"About the Simes, or rather the one you brought to this compound," he added harshly. "Because of that incident the other Simes are now being totally unreasonable."

Shocked by his attitude she said, "What do you care about what a bunch of raiders think? Especially when they were looking at you like you were going to be the perfect victim for their trap. I wasn't going to leave one of Carre's people there to die. Not with the menacing mood they were in."

"That Sime would have rather died then face the displacement you forced upon him by that wild ride, if he had even been alive in the first place!"

Alissa surged to her feet. "He was dead?" she croaked out.

Jeanetta's hesitation when she mentioned the Sime back in the clearing suddenly made sense. Jeanetta had realized he was dead. Why hadn't she said anything?

Because, Alissa reasoned, Jeanetta was from out-Territory. She probably hadn't known what to think when told by Alissa that they had to get the body, assuming it was a necessary ritual or something for burial.

"Yes, he was dead," Tannon said between gritted teeth. "He was also their cousin. Raiders murdered him. Lemel and I had been on a journey and came upon the body. The men accused us. We had no trouble convincing them it wasn't us, until you came riding down into the middle of everything yelling for us to run!"

Alissa paled, her vision dimmed. She had to sit down.

"I told you to stop, Alissa. I told you to leave the body! Why can't you ever listen to anything I say? Why must you always go your own way?"

He snorted and walked around the desk. "Then you come in here and demand I let you pledge. You can't even follow my orders! There is nothing to convince me you would be able to function well in the roll of a Companion. Do you even know what a Companion does?"

"Of course," she replied hotly.

"What?" he demanded, seating himself. He clasped his hands together, and waited though his penetrating gaze never left her. She walked over to the desk, her steps slowing as she reached it.

"Well, to serve you--" she began, running her fingers over the polished wood.

"Any channel," he cut in.

"Well, yes. Any channel."

In her agitation she reached out to pick up a small thin blade Tannon used to open letters with.

Tannon snatched it from her grasp with a look of absolute horror on his face. Frustration at the little forgotten matter of how any Sime absolutely refused to allow a Gen to touch anything that might possibly be the slightest bit sharp, she scowled. She had thought at one time that Tannon trusted her more than that. Obviously, now he didn't trust her at all. Replying louder than she intended because of her anger at Tannon's reaction, she said, "There's also the infirmary. They do that and help wherever they're required. Um, there is the internal shunt...What?"

Tannon was shaking his head in disgust. "Lemel may not come near matching you in draw or capacity but he's a true Companion." Pointedly he stored the letter opener in his desk drawer, then made a point of turning the key in the lock with a loud click, making sure it was locked, much like she surmised he had done with his emotions, locking her totally away from any hint of what he might really be feeling.

He flinched at Alissa's reaction. She couldn't control the insult she felt at his actions. Lemel stared at her as if she were beneath contempt, though she thought there might be just a hint of triumph in his eyes. "I'm willing to learn," she whispered, her voice sounding weak to her own ears. "You'd force me to leave when you know you're short Companions? You won't even let me prove myself? New channels and Companions are allowed to go through training their first year and learn --"

"You've had half a year already," he stated.

"Not here. Yet, you won't even give me six months, five months, a month," she cried out, her chest aching at what he was saying.

He leaned back in his chair, folded his hands behind his head and studied her speculatively. "You think you can learn everything there is to learn about a Companion in just a month?"

"Yes," she said, then added, "or enough to serve you."

"Forget it. I wouldn't come near you," he said.

Her pride felt ground into the floor and she wanted to shout, but she bit down on the inside of her lip to keep from responding.

"That's fine. You just give me a month and I'll show you what I know."

"Tannon," Lemel began, but Tannon waved a tentacle in his direction, silencing him.

"You've got yourself a month."

Alissa blinked, unable to believe he had actually given her any time at all. Air whooshed out of her lungs in relief. "So, where do you want me to work? The infirmary? With first year channel's? Where?"

"Lemel, send for B'eki."

Lemel suddenly smiled and went to the door. That smile made Alissa very uneasy.

When he came back there was a young Sime woman with him. Alissa smiled. It was obvious the lady was in awe of the Sectuib which meant she didn't work closely with him, which meant, Alissa suddenly realized, that this girl was probably renSime.

As if reading her thoughts--no the rat was probably zlinning her emotions--he said, "B'eki is doing a great job of trading with Norlea. I want you to be her escort until I decide otherwise."

Alissa shot to her feet. The girl wavered at her outburst. Tannon sliced Alissa a warning glance and Lemel was torn between protecting two Simes. Alissa immediately sat back down, forcing herself to calm down. "But Tannon," Alissa said as sweetly as possible. "I'm a Companion. Perhaps the Sectuib has made a mistake, for surely my duties would be more ... profitable somewhere else."

"I've made no mistake," Tannon said calmly. "You may go, B'eki. Alissa will be ready to work with you in the morning."

B'eki shot a wary look at Alissa before slipping from the office. "You've got to be kidding," Alissa said as soon as the door was closed.

"I am not," he replied. "But it looks like you were," he added, his pen pausing over his papers. "You evidently weren't serious about learning to be a Companion or you wouldn't be questioning my advice."

"But an escort," she said, outrage in her voice. "My field is higher than most of the high field Companions in Carre when I'm low. And yet you would waste that by sending me as an errand girl."

"I'd rather do that than risk you hurting anyone here," he said. "Take it or leave it."

Many things raged in her mind that she would like to say to him, some of them would shock his tentacles right back into their sheaths looking for cover. But she would not give him the satisfaction. "I ... take ... it," she gritted out.

Tannon looked mildly surprised. "Good. She'll tell you what she wants you to do. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm busy. Besides trying to find out just who it was that surprised us back there, I also had to deal with the enraged relatives of the Sime you stole. Because of that I'm behind on my paperwork which I have to get done before infirmary duty."

"Yes, Sectuib."

"I'm not your Sectuib, Alissa," Tannon said and this time there was a trace of bitterness in his voice. "Address me as Tannon."

So no one would think he had caved in and let her join the House, she supposed. Now those looks on everyone's faces made sense. Their Sectuib was falling apart and they blamed her. There were some who were whispering about tossing him out because of her.

Standing, she bowed her head slightly. "I'll go rest. The fosebine is doing it's job admirably. I hope you don't mind if I don't show up for supper tonight."

"You follow the rules of the House," he replied simply, not answering her question. In other words, if she were a Companion she would know whether she was required to be at dinner or not.

Without another word she turned and headed toward the door.

"I'll be right back, Sectuib," Lemel said and Alissa realized Lemel was right behind her.

She smiled slightly in greeting. "Lemel. It's ... good ... to see you. I'm sorry we didn't get to talk earlier but I hope we can now. Who's Tannon's regular Companion now?"

"I am."

"But you're nowhere near his capacity," she said then sighed at his angry look. "I didn't mean that the way it sounded. I just meant, I wondered if --"

"At least I'm dependable and steady."

Alissa recoiled, surprised, though she shouldn't be, by his attack. "I thought you were on my side, Lemel. You did help me to cross the border."

Lemel's face reddened. "Sure, I helped. We all thought you'd discussed everything with Tannon and he was going into transfer knowing you were leaving."

Alissa's guilt was obvious in the slow color that stained her cheeks. "I didn't mean to hurt him," she replied straightening her spine and declaring defiantly. "I thought he understood. I care for Tannon. I'd never --"

Furiously, Lemel turned on her. "Care? How can you even say that? After what you did to him--"

Alissa stiffened defensively. "I mean what I said. I just didn't think--"

"That's right. You sure didn't. Right after transfer, you blithely announce you're leaving and go without a backward glance. Do you realize how much time it took us to get Tannon back in working condition after you messed him up so? Did you even think that he had just lost his last Companion saving you? Or that there was no other Gen near his speed or selyn supply to serve him? No Companion would have done what you did. He was a wreck and still is."

"But who's fault is that?" she questioned, refusing to take the entire blame. "If you're his Companion now, then you should take charge of him, and make him rest and do what you say. I know you think I don't care about him but believe me, if I thought my presence was hurting him in any way then I'd leave."

Lemel folded his arms belligerently and continued, "I do care for him. Obviously more than you if you don't think your presence is hurting him. You saunter in here and expect to return to your old duties? I don't blame Tannon for his mistrust! Unless you're willing to do as Tannon says, it would be better if you leave, best had you never returned."

Alissa reeled from the anger in his voice. "Better had I not come?" She stared aghast at his attitude.

"You don't believe in what we do. You're arrival will only flame the fires of dissent. And Tannon is finally getting used to me as his Companion. How can you think anyone would want you here knowing all of that? I came out here to tell you I want you to stay away from him."

She stared at Lemel, unable to believe his anger, but accepting it as her due but disagreeing just the same. "I can't do that," Alissa finally said. "I'm going to prove to him, to you all, that I can be the best shendoni-be-flayed Companion you've seen."

Lemel rolled his eyes. "You won't last two weeks," he muttered. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to Tannon's side. I happen to know he'll require my help after that little display of emotion you've put on this morning and then just a few minutes ago."

He turned and went back inside the office, leaving Alissa reeling from the anger in his voice. Slowly she climbed the stairs to her room, wondering the whole time if everyone felt that way about her.

She was going to have an uphill battle if they did. But Lemel? Why was he so angry? Maybe he felt threatened. She could understand that. Under any other circumstances he would never be matched with Tannon. Of that she was certain. Or maybe he was really upset at her. She had handled her leaving badly. Alissa would give anything to go back and change it. And this morning hadn't helped any. She'd made an awful mistake.

Sighing, Alissa slipped into her room, closing the door quietly behind her. Pulling off her clothes she lay down on the bed, barely noting how soft it felt.

Tannon had said he didn't want her there, wanted her gone. Her heart ached at the thought, the pain almost unbearable. Surely she hadn't come this far only to fail? No. Alissa wouldn't believe that. She'd be on her best regard over the next month, do her best to prove to Tannon she could learn what she had to so she could stay, do her best to follow the shendoni-be-flayed rules.

Her mind tried to plan, desperate to go over all she had heard and said this morning, but her body and the medicine fought her and won. Slowly, quietly, Alissa drifted off into oblivion, her sought after solutions just out of reach.

He couldn't believe she was back.

Tannon ambrov Carre collapsed back against his desk, his knees feeling like jelly. Leave it to Alissa to make a grand entrance. He ran a shaky hand through his hair.

"I'm back, now where were we?" Lemel said coming into the room.

His nager hit Tannon like a blast of hot angry heat. His already abused system from bad transfers threatened to crumble. Tannon closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry, Sectuib. Let me help you."

Cool Gen hands slid around him as his Companion immediately closed off his anger and turned his attention to straightening out Tannon's system. It'd been too long since he'd had a good transfer. Seeing Alissa and her system had made him almost delirious with need. No, it wasn't time for him to take transfer yet, but the promise of her as she'd stood there in front of him...he almost groaned.

Shuven, few people had what Alissa had, if she could only learn to focus. He'd done his best to stay hypoconscious while she'd stood in front of him. He'd been afraid of something she'd do that might send him into convulsions or tempt him to act on his overwhelming desire to engage her field. It was best not to zlin it if it was going to tempt him like that. He just had to have a good transfer this month. He could do it, would do it with Lemel.

Lemel forced Tannon down on the couch, though it didn't take much to force him. "Lay here."

Tannon focused on Lemel as he narrowed his concentration in on him. Slowly the shakiness left his body. "It'll be good this time. Just relax right now. You've been pushing yourself too hard over the dissension in the ranks."

Tannon sighed. "I'm still not sure what I want to do. I know Jorgre thinks I'm failing in my refusal to allow people to live outside the walls and still be members of the House. However, until we're totally unified within the walls I'm not going to dilute our numbers by allowing them to live outside the walls with their families."

"And now Alissa comes along."

Tannon winced. Lemel immediately focused, again doing his best to ease Tannon's worries by presenting a calm soothing presence for Tannon to rest on. Tannon knew he was doing his best, but for the first time in months he realized it wasn't going to do anything to diminish Alissa's presence. While she was gone, he'd been able to push her and their transfers to the back of his mind, but now, with her hovering within his sight constantly, she was going to be a major problem between him and his Companion. This did not bode well for his next transfer. Inwardly he cursed her arrival. If not for her, he wouldn't be in such a mess. He wouldn't have realized the good transfers he'd been missing, wouldn't be aborting. If not for her, he would be functioning and the House wouldn't be split down the middle over his inadequacies. He had to heal the breach in his House, but as long as his transfers kept souring, he wasn't going to get any better.

"What are you going to do about her?" Lemel asked when Tannon's breathing eased and he had relaxed.

"Keep her as far away from me as possible," Tannon replied. "She says she wants a chance. I'll give her a chance."

"Do you think that's wise? I don't think she should even be inside the gates near you," Lemel protested.

"What am I supposed to do? Toss her outside to the junct Simes?" Tannon demanded easing up on the couch. He still felt weak and shaky, but not on the verge of collapse. Wearily he wiped a hand down his face. "She's come back. In a way, I'm responsible for her."

"All you did was rescue her on the road and keep her from getting killed. She's the one who decided to go to Gen Territory and leave you. You had nothing to do with that decision."

But you did. Though Tannon didn't say it, it hung in the air between them. Tannon knew it was Lemel who had set up the way for Alissa to find safe passage to Gen Territory. He'd told Lemel it didn't matter, but right now, past his turnover point--a point halfway through a Sime's cycle where they had used up over half their selyn--he remembered.

"Look, Secutib," Lemel said sitting back and giving Tannon room to push up further, "I'm not asking you to throw her out, but there is V'lar. V'lar is short Companions. They're a new House. How many of our group broke off and formed that House, though it is in Zeor's area. Couldn't you send her up there?"

Tannon smiled. "I wouldn't do that. Sherinal would serve me up to the Gen police if I sent someone to them as unfocused and distracted as Alissa currently is."

"Or she might thank you if she could harness that distraction and teach her how to focus with it."

"As would Carre," Tannon said. "If Alissa can learn to be a Companion, everything it entails, she would be what we require. We've lost too many channels and Companions. I hate to give her up until I know."

"And you feel responsible for her," Lemel said, resigned.

"And I feel responsible for her," Tannon echoed. "I promised her one month. She's got that much time to prove to me she can focus, work as a Companion in no matter what job I assign her. If she can just learn to follow orders and not go off thinking on something else--"

"Impossible."

Tannon shrugged. "I fear you're right. But like you said, if she can learn ... Look what you've learned in the last three months."

Lemel had no comment to that. After all, he was not Tannon's equal and had taken great leaps in the last three months to be Companion to him.

Tannon knew Lemel was trying. But he wasn't quite where he should be. He knew that. Lemel knew that. The only thing was, he didn't know why. But what Lemel lacked in other areas he made up for in focusing. When Tannon had something that had to be done, Lemel could sit for hours and do exactly what Tannon asked without wavering. Had it not been for him, Tannon wouldn't have made it these past three months. He was going to be depending on him to get him through this next month with Alissa around.

He freely admitted some of her antics sent cold chills down his spine. When she'd grabbed the letter opener earlier, he'd been afraid she might decide to toss it from hand to hand, not thinking about the consequences to any Sime in the building were she to accidentally cut herself. He still shuddered at the thought! He had thought he'd known her, but realized too late that he knew nothing about her, nor did she understand her impact on a Sime whether she meant to or not. No way was he going to allow her to experiment on him again. Nor was he going to risk himself with her when his system was so out of kilter.

"She'll stay. I'll allow her to work here for a month. If at the end of that time she shows a radical change, then we'll discuss her staying on longer. If she hasn't changed, then we'll talked about V'lar. But I am not sending her to V'lar until I see how she does. Is that understood?"

Lemel nodded. "Now, Sectuib, do me a favor?"

"What?" Tannon asked, recognizing that determined look in his Companion's eyes.

"We have a transfer coming up soon. I want you to spend the next hour resting, thinking good thoughts...no worries, no paperwork, just rest."

Tannon wanted to argue. But with Alissa showing up, the stakes had been raised. He would require every bit of control he could muster to make sure this transfer didn't go bad and Alissa didn't in some way distract him. He would submit to his Companion's request. "I think that sounds good. If you promise to have Jorgre cover for me."

Lemel grimaced but nodded. Standing he said, "As you wish. I'll go find him now."

Lemel left the room, closing the door quietly behind him. He strode down the hall intending to find Jorgre and give him the message. Knowing he would be finishing up in his office and heading toward free time, he stopped by there. Not pausing to knock, for Jorgre was a Sime and would know he was on the other side of the door, he pushed it open. Immediately he wished he'd waited.

"Trouble?" Lemel eyed B'eki and Jorgre who stood nose to nose. Jorgre looked at ease leaning back against his desk, with his Companion at his elbow. B'eki looked angry.

"No problems," B'eki replied, though she was still scowling at Jorgre. She was renSime, a Sime who only had one system in them and had to take transfer from a channel each month. She had no Companion with her as they were reserved for channels. Jorgre could handle anything that might come up with a renSime. Normally. However, B'eki was the leader among the House that believed in blind obedience to Tannon whereas Jorgre believed it might be best for Tannon to step down. Not a good situation, and one Lemel had wished he could have avoided.

Smoothly he stepped up by B'eki, insinuating his field between her and the other two people in the room. "Tannon is going to have to miss this session in the infirmary today. He wants you to reschedule with him. If you'll see to it."

Jorgre frowned, but nodded.

"You come with me," he said gently to B'eki. "I have some questions about the supplies going into town."

Without a backward glance he left the office, B'eki with him. "Were you telling the truth or was that just an excuse to get me out of his office?" B'eki asked as they started across the compound.

"I wanted to get you out of his office. But I did want to ask you about tomorrow. Tannon assigned Alissa to work with you and I wanted to make sure you keep a close eye on her."

"Why?" B'eki asked bewildered.

"She's come back from out-Territory. Tannon is a mess because of the transfer she gave him and then dumping him just before she left. He assigned her with you because he expects her to fail. You should have seen Tannon. He panicked when she walked into his office. He doesn't want her near him. I can't blame him. I imagine doing the work with you when you'll be going outside is the best way he can think of to keep her away from him. Still, it's up to you to help me make sure that we keep her away from Tannon."

B'eki nodded. "You have Secutib's best interests at heart, I'm sure. You know, everyone is talking about her. Some don't believe she lied to Tannon about leaving and going out-Territory. They say she just didn't know what she was doing when she waited until after transfer to inform him she wasn't staying, that she didn't realize we'd lost so many others before her and that it would crush Tannon to lose another Companion."

She whispered the last. Lemel knew B'eki worshipped her Sectuib. "I know you can't grasp anyone putting their own loyalties and feelings before the Household. That was Tannon's problem. He was raised in this Household. He couldn't imagine anyone leaving. I'm afraid letting her stay here a month is going to end up another mistake for him. But once he's made up his mind, there's no changing it."

"She's only going to be here a month?"

Lemel shrugged. "Until we can confirm it with V'lar and send her up there." Lemel had no doubt that Alissa would mess up and be sent away. She didn't have what it took to be a good Companion. Not like he did. "Until then she'll be with you. Make sure she has plenty to keep her busy."

B'eki frowned. "I'd prefer not to work with her if she's only going to be here a month. It'd be a waste of my time to train her only to have her leave. Why would Secutib assigning me someone like that?"

Lemel shrugged. "The best way to keep her away from him, I imagine. Anyway, think you can do that? Keep a close eye on her, warn me if she gets out of hand?"

A militant light came into B'eki's eyes. "Don't worry, I won't let her bother the Sectuib. Send him my good wishes too."

Lemel leaned down and planted a kiss on her cheek. "I'll see you later when I have a break. Thanks."

He turned and started back across the compound toward the main building. With Alissa covered he could now concentrate on making sure Tannon got what would help him over the next week: rest, peace of mind, and a good transfer.

"Okay, now listen, horse. Everything is loaded. All we have to do is get you hitched up and you'll be ready to go."

Alissa scowled when the horse bared it's teeth. This was the same horse she'd ridden in on, looking none the worse for wear. It looked like it wanted to take a bite out of her again.

She edged closer, grabbing the leather straps to lead it to the cart.

It threw it's head back in objection.

"Look, I'm sorry I rode you so hard. What do you want from me? Must you be so stubborn?"

A snort from behind her informed her she wasn't alone. She dropped the reins and whirled around to find Lemel standing there watching her.

Then in pain, she yelped. "It bit me!" she cried out, grabbing her bottom and swinging back toward the horse. The abrupt movement tangled her in the in the leather straps and she fell.

Lemel jumped forward, grabbing the straps and soothing the mare. "First lesson. Pay attention to what you're doing."

Alissa stood, rubbing her offended backside. "And you work around horses?" she demanded.

He raised a haughty eyebrow. "Hardly. I'm Tannon's Companion now."

He sounded so smug she wanted to rub is face in the smelly droppings the horse had just presented to them. Lemel ignored her glare and continued, "I had to speak with B'eki. But I do know enough that if you're going to do something, then you have to give that task your complete attention."

"I was," she replied to Lemel, though she had been remembering that day she'd arrived, she realized now, instead of actually concentrating on getting the horse ready.

"Here," he said, tossing her the reins. "See if you can finish it."

"I'm going to succeed, Lemel. No matter how you look down your nose at me or what you say, I'm going to prove to Tannon that I belong here."

"It's not just Tannon you're gonna have to convince, but Carre," he said, strolling off, his tone stating that he thought that task impossible.

She gritted her teeth and tried to ignore the fear his words touched in her. "Come on, you lazy horse." She pulled on the leather and led the reluctant animal to the cart. "Now stand still and let me ... aw, oh!" She looked down and grimaced. "Just how often do you have to do that?" She wiped her shoe in the grass. "You know, Lemel is wrong." She hooked the mangy beast to the cart. "I think you understand me. I do pay attention. Okay, so B'eki's assistant said to hook you up first and I didn't. That's why I'm doing it instead of the stable hand. I had no idea she wouldn't be here later. Just ... stand ... still," she grunted, pushing against the stubborn animal, trying to back it up so she could latch it to the cart.

"There," she said, stepping back, wiping sweat from her brow.

She spied Lemel coming to the door. He leaned his head in then walked away, a content look on his face. Surely he and B'eki weren't...

Nah.

Rubbing her left shoulder which was sore, she waited for Lemel to turn around and check her progress. He never once looked back.

"I wanted the cart ready tomorrow afternoon, not now! The jewelry was what had to go today. Can't you read?"

Alissa jumped then gritted her teeth against B'eki's scathing tone. It had been this way four hours now. Alissa was certain B'eki had no intention of changing her attitude. She turned to B'eki who was striding toward her, anger on her features.

Alissa wanted to blame B'eki's attitude on need, for the woman would probably be receiving transfer tomorrow. But Alissa knew that wasn't the cause. No, the woman had made it plain when Alissa had shown up this morning to start her duties that she didn't think Alissa had really been too ill to work the last three days. She believed Alissa had been sulking over the fact that she had to be an escort instead of a Companion.

Alissa had tried to explain about her injuries and how she'd been too stiff to move the next day, but B'eki was having none of it. Instead, she'd immediately begun ordering Alissa around like a drudge. "The duty sheet you gave me said you wanted the cart ready today at this time," Alissa replied, angry and not wanting to back down again to this overbearing woman.

"Obviously you weren't paying attention," B'eki snapped, coming to an abrupt stop in front of Alissa. "The sheet says tomorrow at this time for those supplies." She waved a tentacle toward the decorated cooking pans and utensils.

It was no use. The woman wasn't going to budge. Taking a slow deep breath, Alissa replied. "I will unpack the cart. Then I'll--"

"No," B'eki said petulantly. "The jewelry has to go into town this afternoon. I was going to send Siella since Morget is so impossibly stubborn when it comes to the date and time of deliveries for the jewelry. But, since this is already packed too I'll have to go because S'werd, the owner of the store where we trade the cooking utensils will talk to no one else. This has really messed up my schedule for the day," she added, tossing Alissa an overwrought look. "I would think you could at least follow simple directions, but no, you have to muck this up as well." The implied words referring to the only other thing she'd mucked up: Tannon.

B'eki continued to mutter as she strode back to her office.

Tannon, I will get you for this, Alissa thought, vengefully. Four hours. Only four hours she'd been here and she was ready to throttle the renSime. Still, however angry B'eki made her, she had to talk to B'eki before they left. Crossing through the metal shop where she'd just been thoroughly humiliated in front of the workers, she wove her way to the back office. B'eki was just coming out, heading for the side door where the cart was parked.

"B'eki," Alissa called, hurrying to catch up.

"What is it?" B'eki demanded waspishly.

"Do you think you should be going into town today? You're very close to need. I imagine Tannon wouldn't like it."

B'eki's lip curled in a sneer at the way Alissa called him Tannon instead of Sectuib. It only reminded these people that she was not a Householder like everyone else here. "I'm sure you wouldn't know what Tannon would or wouldn't allow since you haven't been here in awhile. He assigned you to help me. If you can't do it without complaining, I'll be glad to go to Sectuib and request he find you someplace else to work."

Alissa suddenly wondered if maybe she hadn't hit on the problem behind B'eki's anger. "You don't want me here, do you?" she asked.

B'eki, who was just climbing onto the seat of the cart, hesitated. "I just wonder why I'm being punished is all," she replied.

Alissa sighed. What had she expected? For the woman to break down and confess that her anger was wrong and tearfully apologize for her attitude? "You've done nothing," Alissa replied. "Your Sectuib is simply trying to teach me to follow rules. He thinks I tend to ignore them."

She adjusted her cape and moved around on the seat to a more comfortable position. "Well, are you coming?" she asked.

"Yeah, right now."

Alissa, grabbed the Householding cape from across the seat and slipped it on. At least in Norlea she would be wearing Carre's colors. The beautiful sky blue and silver was a prize she coveted above all else. Yet one that would be denied her if she could not pass Tannon's tests. She gave the horse a wide berth and climbed warily into the cart.

She really hated horses.

B'eki lifted the reins and steered the horse from Carre.

The sun beat down on their uncovered heads. At least it wasn't raining--yet. Birds sang in nearby trees and a muggy breeze stirred the leaves, creating the occasional rustle of sound.

Carre.

She'd forgotten how peaceful it was and how vast around the outer perimeter. But she knew all of that was a facade. One wrong move with the town folks and they could have a major war on their hands.

"I've only been to Norlea once," Alissa said as the horse plodded along the road into town. "I remember looking out at the Mizipi River and thinking how large it was."

"They get a lot of trade there," B'eki murmured. "For those who are willing to risk traveling by water," she added and snapped the reins to hurry the horse on.

Only minutes outside Carre's gates they passed a large mound of rocks and then were miraculously in Norlea. One wouldn't realize it was so close to Carre if they didn't venture beyond the stones. Yet here a Sime town sat, a large town filled with commerce and trade, and vital to Carre's well-being. She'd heard Tannon talking about the trade with the town and how important it was and how much money they made from it. Carre wouldn't stay afloat without that trade. Alissa had often wondered if that was how Carre's motto, Unity through Peace had developed. She'd have to read the Householding books one day and find out.

"So, tell me where we're going?" Alissa questioned as she glanced around at the teaming activity. Women and children hurried from one store to another doing their daily errands. Shop keepers, dressed in an apron, in case of the baker, and very little else but sweat, in the case of the blacksmith, worked diligently as people came and went from their businesses. She spotted a cloth merchant, and several vegetable vendors.

The sound of metal being pounded into shapes, children whining as their mother dragged them along behind them, the creaking of wagons they passed all added to the symphony of sound that marked this as a thriving city. People stood together laughing over the latest news, complaining about what they didn't like, and all eyeing warily or with outright disgust, Carre's representatives as they passed by.

"We're headed to the shop at the end of the road, four streets down. S'werd buys our utensils. We told him we'd be by tomorrow, but he'll accept us today. He doesn't care to do business with the Household, and will only deal through me," she added. "And then only because Morget put some pressure on him to buy our stuff. Morget evidently told S'werd if S'werd didn't buy the decorated utensils and pans that he would and set up a section in his shop. As for you," B'eki said, turning a warning gaze on Alissa, "S'werd will despise you simply because you're Gen, so try not to do anything embarrassing while we're there." B'eki maneuvered the cart around a parked wagon then continued toward their goal.

"We'll save Morget until last. He isn't overly fond of Householders either, but trusts me implicitly. If I can't be here I only send Siella, since I'm still trying to reassure him of our peaceful presence in dealing with him. He's a nice old man. His daughter, C'tin, will be taking over the business soon. She's much more friendly. I think she's probably the one who saw the profit in trading with us. As a matter of fact, if I didn't know better, I'd think she's the reason S'werd is now dealing with us. I think S'werd is interested in C'tin." B'eki smiled.

"We make the most money with Morget and C'tin. With S'werd, we usually end up trading for things we can't grow or make at Carre. Of course he cheats us, but there's nothing else we can do."

The cart ambled past several more buildings, rocking precariously as it slipped in the mud from an overnight rain. Unobtrusively as possible, Alissa pushed her hair over her shoulders, trying to easy the muggy heat that was causing her neck to itch with sweat. The fishy smell of the river reached her nose the closer they got to their destination. Sounds of people working as they hauled in their daily catches could now be heard.

"Here we are," B'eki said, pulling up before a clean, whitewashed, two story building. People on the boardwalk slowed their steps and eyed Alissa. "You were right," Alissa said. "These people are looking at me. They probably wonder where your other Gen is," she murmured.

"No. Your field is shining like a lighthouse," B'eki replied, pulling out a few of the first bags she would take into the store.

"Oh, shen," Alissa whispered. "I forgot to have a channel take down my field. Tannon is going to be furious."

B'eki shrugged, unconcerned. Of course, B'eki didn't realize what a temptation Alissa's field would be to a junct. She couldn't or she wouldn't shrug it off so easily Warily, Alissa looked around, wondering if any near her were in need.

She spotted the green flag down the street, not sure if she was relieved or worried that the pens were so close. Reaching into the back of the cart she grabbed two more bags and headed toward the store.

"I didn't think Companions liked their field taken down," B'eki said, going into the store.

"They don't. As a matter of fact, it's a fate almost as bad as death," she muttered. "But provoking someone here is even worse because that is a fate tempting Carre's death."

"Don't you dare do anything to cause Carre or Sectuib trouble. He put me in charge of you and I can tell you right now that I'm one hundred percent loyal to Sectuib."

"Good for you," Alissa muttered under her breath.

"You know how I feel about you bringing your Gen in here," a deep male voice called out.

Alissa followed the sound and saw a tall thin man, looking like he already had one foot in the grave wiping his hands on a towel before coming forward.

"And you know we always travel together," B'eki called back. "Alissa nor Carre would want to offend you, though. Alissa, would you browse the isles while we do business?"

She shrugged though she had trouble believing B'eki sent her other traveling partners off so easily. "If you don't mind," she replied.

B'eki smiled.

It was obviously false if the way the man was eyeing them was any indication. "Lover's quarrel?" he queried of B'eki.

Alissa flushed, turned and started down the nearest isle, his laughter sounding disgusting in her ears. She hated this job. She absolutely hated it. But she had to do this to prove to the stubborn man at Carre that she was ready for her job.

She wanted to be a Companion. Every part of her yearned to be a Companion. Yet Tannon said she couldn't separate rules versus her role. She had the natural talent but didn't understand the first thing about being a Companion. A small niggling voice in the region of her heart asked if Tannon was right, was it possible she wasn't ready? She wondered how working here with this renSime was going to help her.

She paced up and down the isles, keeping a watch on B'eki as she went. When B'eki finally finished bartering, Alissa knew it would only be a moment before B'eki was ready to leave. She ambled over to the door to stare out. Simes were wilting from the heat as they walked along the sidewalks. Alissa felt sorry for the people in the fields at Carre. It had to be sweltering there.

Carts went back and forth, some filled with supplies like their own cart while others were empty. One cart in particular caught her attention. The man driving it as well as his crew were obviously drunk. The driver lurched sideways as he slapped his reins against the horses flanks, hollering for it to hurry up. As it pulled even with the store, one of the wheels sank in a mud puddle. The owner cursed and urged the horse forward, but to no avail. The wagon refused to budge any further. Alissa would have turned away, but suddenly realized his wagon along with Carre's cart was blocking the entire street to traffic. Glancing back at B'eki, she thought to hurry her so they could move the cart. Seeing she was filling her bags with supplies and would be there any moment, Alissa decided to watch instead.

The man continued to shout, instructing some of his men to get out and help. Four well-bodied young Simes jumped off their perches and began to heave, trying to get the overweight wagon moving again. For a Sime augmenting it should have been no problem. Yet, for these drunk Simes who couldn't stand up long enough to focus on what they were doing, it was impossible. Across the street people began to gather and watch the spectacle. Evidently, because she--a Gen and Householder--was standing in the door of the store, the townspeople were going to avoid her.

Alissa smiled when the people who were gathering began to snicker at the spectacle. The mud was so slick the men who were assisting with the wagon were providing comic relief. One would slip, fall in the mud and struggle back up. Just as he got up another would fall. But it wasn't just because it was slick, no indeed. One completely missed the wheel that he had grabbed for and went down face first in the muddy water. When his friend bent over to help him up, he was unable to sustain the weight of the man he pulled on and landed on top of him.

Alissa shook her head, enjoying the scene. The people who's wagons were blocked certainly weren't enjoying it, though they seemed reluctant to offer a helping hand. Some were beginning to grumble, while others were getting out of their conveyances to run into the nearby stores on quick errands. One man coming down the street snared Alissa's attention. It was a Sime in need and he was headed straight for the crowd, dragging a chained Gen behind him.

Her heart ached as she watched the pitiful creature follow the Sime. Had it not been for Tannon she would be one of those chained Gens, or worse, already be dead.

The man, seeing his way blocked on the opposite side of the street, veered around the crowd, intending to slip between the stuck wagon and their cart. Just as he was passing their cart, the unthinkable happened.

The wagon came loose with a jolt. The Sime, pulling the Gen along behind him, augmented to avoid being run down. The Gen wasn't so lucky. Only the widening of his eyes indicated he knew what was happening. Before he could even scream, the wagon was on top of him. Unconsciously, Alissa started forward.

She was by their cart when Gen pain screamed through the ambient. Simes shuddered, curling in on themselves while others were shocked hyperconscious.

Alissa's hairs stood on end. B'eki! her mind screamed.

She swung around to see B'eki, hyperconscious heading straight for the pen Gen. The other Sime was too.

Doing the only thing she could think of, Alissa flared her field to attract B'eki's attention.

B'eki immediately turned. Alissa's arms just cleared her sides when B'eki attacked. Alissa and B'eki went rolling. By the time they'd come up against the wall of the store, B'eki was done.

Opening her eyes, she stared for a moment in stunned shock, then shuddered. Out of the corner of her eye she saw the astonishment of the crowd turn to disgust, then rage. "Uh, B'eki," Alissa said. "I hate to do this...but we've got to go...now!"

Muttering began and then someone threw something. "Perverts! Right in front of us, will you!" A rock glanced off Alissa's shoulder.

B'eki, galvanized by the missiles shooting toward them and the Simes advancing, shot up, grabbing Alissa by the arm. "Come on!" she said.

Pulling her back into the store, she made for the stairs.

"Hey, you can't do--"

The proprietor got no further for B'eki did. Right up the stairs into his private rooms. She slammed and locked the door.

"Where are we going?" Alissa asked, panting from being hauled up the stairs almost faster than she could traverse them, but thankful, for otherwise one of the angry Simes would have had them by now.

Pounding started on the door.

"Out," B'eki said, and headed toward the window.

"You're forgetting I'm Gen," Alissa cried, looking down below.

"Come on outta' there, you filthy perverts!" a voice snarled.

Alissa glanced at the door.

"You want to face them or take your chances?" B'eki demanded.

"My chances," Alissa said. After all, had she been paying attention, B'eki would have never experienced the Gen pain and been shocked into kill mode. Had she been doing her job and staying by B'eki like she should have, they wouldn't be here now.

B'eki bolted into the bedroom and checked that window. "Here," she called out. Alissa hurried in, the thundering against the door reaching deafening proportions.

"We can jump to that low shed and crawl up on the adjacent roof top. That'll give us enough time that we should be able to get two or three buildings away before they can work their way around these buildings and catch up with us."

Alissa nodded, praying B'eki was right.

"Go," B'eki said.

"You first," Alissa replied.

"And leave you in here? Forget it. Sectuib is obviously upset at me over something or you wouldn't have been assigned to me. I'm not going to be blamed for this." She shuddered again.

"You didn't kill," Alissa said, suddenly realizing that B'eki was having trouble accepting what had happened.

"I could have. You're lucky you weren't--"

"Not luck, B'eki. I'm a Companion, remember?"

B'eki grabbed Alissa's arm and shoved her through the window. "Go or neither one of us will have time to finish this argument later."

Alissa went, falling clumsily to the flat roof of the shed. B'eki was immediately behind her and pulling her up to the next roof. Alissa had never felt so awkward in her life. Gaining her feet they sprinted across the rooftop, Alissa being hauled roughly behind B'eki until she had a stitch in her side. Just as they started down the sloped jewelry shop roof, Alissa heard a shout.

"They're through the door," Alissa said grimly

"And will be here any time. Can't you run any faster?"

Incredulous, Alissa stared. "I'm a Gen, B'eki, remember?"

"You're gonna be a dead Gen," she shot back.

Distant footsteps echoed. "Here," B'eki said, grabbing the reins to a horse.

"There they are!"

Alissa didn't look back. She didn't argue about stealing the horse. She didn't pause. She vaulted onto the bare back of the horse. B'eki was right behind her, digging her feet into the mount, almost causing Alissa to fall. A man came running out of the jewelry store his face a mask of shock. "One month supplies free," B'eki called. "In the cart. We'll bring the mount back."

"The owner, you're friend?" Alissa asked, between gasps of breath.

"Former friend, probably," she said.

Startled looks met their own desperate ones as they flew through town and toward Carre, neither speaking as each contemplated the events that had just transpired. "What are we going to tell Sectuib?" B'eki moaned as they approached the gate.

"No one's following. Don't worry about it, B'eki. I'll talk to him." Alissa did her best to reassure the renSime. But she had to admit that B'eki had voiced her own question too. What was she going to tell Tannon?

The gate was open. People were already turning, looking to see what brought them back in such a rush, and without the cart.

B'eki slowed the horse and led it directly to the stables. She slid off, Alissa right behind her. "Feed it. It belongs to a friend in town," she said to a stable girl who came out.

They turned toward the main building located in the middle of the acreage both hesitating as they decided what to tell Tannon.

Their hesitation did no good. Tannon, followed by Lemel, came striding out of the building. Had he been able to zlin that far? Alissa wondered. Of course. Tannon could zlin that far and further. He'd probably sensed something amiss as they'd entered the gates.

"Oh, shen," Tannon whispered, his step faltering as he zlinned them. "Shen!" he cursed louder and hurried his pace. "You," he said to B'eki never taking his gaze from Alissa, "to the infirmary. And you," He leveled a glaring look on Alissa. "I'd better find your backside planted on the bench outside my office when I return."

He swung around and followed B'eki toward the main building and infirmary.

Alissa followed more slowly, quietly entering the building, as if the least little sound might call attention to herself. She couldn't help slinking in like a whipped puppy. She's seen that look on Tannon's face before. He was furious.

Her steps sounding loud in the quiet hall, she nonetheless did her best to walk with her head up. It'd do no good to allow anyone coming or going to see her defeated. Turning to the left, away from the cafeteria, she passed the donation rooms. The infirmary was on the right, though only a couple of doors opened on this side for emergency purposes. At the end of the hall she turned right. Here were the main doors to the infirmary while on the left were the offices. In the Northwest corner of the building was the Sectuib's office. She passed the offices and infirmary doors without a word. She knew there were glances cast her way, was certain even now news was spreading about B'eki, but she didn't dare let on she cared.

At the Sectuib's door she seated herself on the bench, feeling much like a naughty child sent to the office. She smoothed the legs of her pants, then pulled at her boots before crossing her hands in her lap.

It seemed like hours as people came and went from the infirmary and offices, but was probably only minutes before Tannon came out of the door across the hall. He didn't pause, only flicked a tentacle at her as he pushed open the door to his office and strode in. Peevishly, she looked around for his Companion, certain Lemel would enjoy gloating over her disaster. But he wasn't there.

Alissa stood, relieved that no one was going to be there to witness this. Going in, she quietly closed the door behind her. But instead of being behind his desk, Tannon was near the furniture that was loosely clumped around the cold fireplace. He was pacing back and forth, back and forth.

As softly as possible she inched toward where he paced, then waited. It wasn't long in coming.

"I know I don't want to ask this, but how, Alissa? How did this happen?"

"Well, when we were in town --"

"Not that!. How did a non-junct renSime who was in need end up in town with a Companion whose field is a welcoming beacon for every angry Sime in the territory?"

She sighed. She'd just known he'd be mad about that. And she didn't want to tell him. "Wouldn't you rather hear about what happened in town first?"

"No. It's obvious. You gave a renSime, a renSime transfer. Do you know what she's going to ... no. You're not distracting me. Tell me how you ended up in town with a field like that." He obviously believed that was why B'eki had attacked her.

She was going to be tossed out to the townspeople when he found out the whole story, she thought miserably.

"Well?" he demanded.

"I, um, was busy and just forgot," she muttered.

"Forgot!" His voice rose an octave, his eyes bulging. "You forgot?" He dropped onto the couch, rubbing his hands at his temples while his tentacles laced with each other in his hair. "You want to be a Companion, Alissa. I gave you a simple job. A job any Gen can do. All you had to do was stick with B'eki, watch out for her, not engage her in transfer."

"But I'm not just any Gen," she cried, feeling his accusations were unfair. "I've only been a Companion since I met you. Out-Territory I had no reason to worry about an accidental, especially in a town and with a renSime. I admit, when the Gen was crushed I acted, thinking like you would with a channel."

"But she's not a channel. She's renSime. And if you had been by her side like you should have, she wouldn't have been jolted into kill mode."

Alissa flushed guilty.

"That's the role of a Companion, Alissa. To protect the Sime. Oh, yeah, you went into town with her, just like you were suppose to, but you failed a basic rule of being a Companion."

Tannon's hands shook as they ran through his hair. Unconsciously, she eased forward, hurting for him as she realized the burden he must be under. "I'm sorry, Tannon," she said, her anger draining away. "It's my fault. I was upset with B'eki and because of that didn't stick as closely to her as I should have."

"You shouldn't have even let her go into town," he returned harshly.

She moved forward until she could ease down by him, wanting so badly to reach out and touch him, ease his pain, but not daring to. "You told me not to practice any Companion skills, Tannon. I was only trying to follow your orders."

Tannon slowly relaxed, his body slumping against the couch. Closing his eyes he leaned his head back and groaned. "That is not what I said, Alissa. I won't allow you to give transfer, engage fields, anything like that. But if someone is going to pull a stupid stunt, you, as a Gen who has worked with channels and know what dangers await a nonjunct Sime out there, should have stopped her. You are a very forceful person, Alissa. Had you put your foot down, B'eki would not have gone."

"It wouldn't have mattered what I said, Tannon," she replied sadly, not wanting to disturb him. His face was etched with weariness. This looked like the first rest he'd gotten since she'd been back. Compassion flooded her for Tannon.

He slumped a little further, the lines easing on his face.

"What do you mean? Of course she would have," he muttered absently, not bothering to open his eyes.

"No, Tannon. They remember what happened. They've followed their Sectuib's lead in shunning me."

Tannon opened his mouth to reply but never got the chance.

"What are you doing!" Lemel demanded, striding into the office.

Tannon jerked upright like he'd been touched by a live wire. Alissa jumped, her gaze shooting guiltily to Tannon. Whether she'd meant to or not she'd been working Tannon, easing his tension. She had been so worried she hadn't noticed.

Nor had Tannon it was apparent. Tannon's eyes narrowed on Alissa as Lemel came up. "Don't ever do that again without my permission," he said softly, deadly serious. "I just told you that not listening to me is what keeps causing problems here. Yet you continue to do what you think is best."

He unconsciously leaned into Lemel who stood next to his shoulder glaring at Alissa. "I've had enough tr