"Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not rejoice in evil but rejoices the truth. It always protects always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." The preceding was I Corinthians 13:4-8. I was watching the popular television show Felicity the other night and it centered around her unrequited love, Ben, listening to her tape to a friend and hearing her say that she thinks it might be love. This made me wonder if Felicity truly loves Ben or if it is just an infatuation. While I was searching for a list of the characteristics of love, I thought, why not go to the ultimate source, the Bible? So, I decided to judge Felicity's "love" by these standards.
        "Love is patient." By this account, Felicity is definitely in love. She moved to New York just to be near Ben even though he did not know she existed. Throughout the whole tulmoltuous freshman year, Felicity tried to get Ben's attention, to no avail. She watched him date her best friend, and still was unfailingly loyal to her love for him.
        "Love is kind." Felicity is definitely kind. She is actually too kind. In an earlier episode she offers to edit Ben's paper for him and ends up changing the entire thing to improve it. When she turns it in it gets the best grade ever gotten on this particular assignment. Since Ben is somewhat less than a stellar student, he is grilled to determine if the paper is actually his work. She also gets less upset when her best friend, who knows of her feelings for Ben, gets involved with him, than I would get in the same situation.
        "It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud." Well, two out of three is not bad. Felicity envies Julie, her friend who becomes involved with Ben. Who wouldn't? It is one of the most potent and dangerous emotions that can be felt. Felicity does not boast. In the latter part of the season, Felicity won Ben's attention from her friend Julie, without the intention to. It was the same thing Julie did to her, but she did not rub it in Julie's face. Felicity is not proud. She is not afraid to apologize when she messes up, or to take the first step to reconciliation with Julie and Noel (the man she chose Ben over).
        "It is not rude, it is not self-seeking." Again, both of these apply to Felicity. She is never rude to anyone it seems, but most especially to Ben. Sometimes she should be rude, but she holds back and treats him well anyway. She is not self-seeking. She has the natural drive that anyone who is going to succeed in life has, but she does not put her own welfare and feelings before those of others. She is always there for Ben, even when it is inconvenient for her.
        "It is not easily angered." This is quite evident when it comes to Felicity and Ben. In a recent episode Felicity waits all night for Ben to show up on their date and he never comes. When she next sees him he says he got tied up with his friend and forgot about it. Although she is very hurt, she accepts that seemingly without a problem. She also lets it go when Ben confesses that he listened to her tape, and that is the reason that he has to break up with her, because it is too serious
        "Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices in the truth." Even though Felicity allows herself to be pushed into the kind of relationship Ben wants with no ties, no expectations, she realizes that by doing so she is lying. She is not the kind of person who can have that type of relationship, and that she has been lying to herself and Ben by pretending to be someone she is not. She is freed in a sense by the truth when she tells Ben this and breaks up with him. Even though she is sad to have lost him, she is liberated by the fact that she was finally true to herself.
        "It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." Again three out of four is not bad. While I can not think of an example of Felicity protecting Ben, she certainly always trusts, hopes and perseveres. When Ben tells her that Julie is moving in with him and his roommate, she says she understands. She trusts him enough to accept him living with an ex-girlfriend. Hope is certainly not missing from this equation either. What else can you call it when someone follows another person across the country, just for a chance with him? Even when he blows her off time after time, she still hopes against hope for Ben to come around. Perseverance comes into play when Ben finally does notice Felicity and asks her to come with him on his trip, during the summer. She did not give up hope that her dream of being with Ben would come true, and in the end her dream did come true, if ever so briefly.
        "Love never fails." Felicity's love for Ben never fails, even when she realizes that it will not work out in their current situation. She still loves him, but she has enough love for him to stop what could be a disastrous development in their relationship. By breaking it off she is making it possible for them to continue to be friends while trying to work things between them out.
        All in all, I think Felicity does love Ben. It is not a completely mature love, but it is definitely love. The characteristics of love that I chose to judge her by are describing a perfect love, like the one God has for us. Since humans are imperfect beings, it makes complete sense that Felicity is missing some of these characteristics.
        

Copyright © 1999 byLara Chancellor. Used with permission.

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